There are two kinds of people in this world. Those that cannot stand to be alone and those who cannot let anyone in.
The first set find being alone a “confirmation” of their perceived ugliness and undesirability and interpreting being alone as “not having that special someone”, they do all they can to be in a relationship. They jump at every person that deigns to give them half a look, they are needy, they might even dumb down their intelligence, pretend to be people they are not, say “yes” to everything and hang unto relationships that make them miserable. No matter what, being alone MUST be avoided.This other person is an escape. A distraction from their disastrous view of self and as long as this person is here, the nagging fear is muted. Dysfunction continues
The second set of people find being alone their refuge and fortress. In keeping people at bay they do not have to face the trauma of others beholding their perceived ugliness and undesirability. So everyone is kept at arms length. They eschew intimacy, they tend to be aggressive, cynical and anti social. They balk at and sabotage every opportunity to cultivate meaningful bonds while mocking those that do, even though it makes them miserable. No matter what, Letting others in MUST be avoided. Isolation is their armor. Secure from the rejection that is sure to follow over their disastrous view of self. As long as they remain outside, the nagging fear will never take flesh. Dysfunction continues.
A third set of people is needed. These will not hide behind a mask because they know they are beautiful and worthy. They know that not everyone will share this opinion and that this changes nothing. They know that their world is shaped by their perception alone. These will not will not look to others to give them meaning and will not remain int toxic relationships because they know their worth. They know they have a place. They know that life is as much theirs as anyone else’s.
Where will the third come from? Not from heaven dear reader but from the hell of the first and second set. They will emerge even as they realize the truth of their worth, place and substance.
So dear reader I ask, where do You fall in?